Bunkenkik is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, sage coyote.

Bunkenkik created the Black Eye Galaxy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bunkenkik, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Bunkenkik, he will turn you into a puffin.

Bunkenkik's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Bunkenkik's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate squirrels.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never go into green rooms.

4. Erect five nickel sculptures of Bunkenkik on top of important buildings.

5. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.