Lapbissyog is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, wise lizard.

Lapbissyog created parasitic wasps nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lapbissyog, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Lapbissyog, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Lapbissyog's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Lapbissyog's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear indigo.

2. Always remove ear rings before touching silicon.

3. Do not gather at bridges at dawn.

4. Always cleanse your hands after touching silver.

5. Do not listen to music.