Fudtitbop is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, grumpy hydra.

Fudtitbop created matter seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fudtitbop, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fudtitbop, he will jump up and down on your head.

Fudtitbop's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Fudtitbop's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum gravity.

2. Always make sure there are no doves in a building before entering it.

3. Never talk about solid mechanics.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Do not take Fudtitbop's name in vain.