Dinbenboss is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, compassionate seal.

Dinbenboss created an up quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dinbenboss, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Dinbenboss, he will think nothing of it.

Dinbenboss' most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Dinbenboss' Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Run away if nine sharks approach from the east.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate rats.

4. Worship no other gods but Dinbenboss.

5. Erect a large lead sculpture of Dinbenboss on top of all buildings.