Latpidcub is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, dishonest giraffe.

Latpidcub created Europe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Latpidcub, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Latpidcub, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Latpidcub's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Latpidcub's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about special relativity near cats while wearing gray kilts and balancing seven aluminium spheres on your arms.

2. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Never think about quantum gravity near otters while wearing black jumpers and balancing eight gold spheres on your face.

4. Do not drink water in red rooms.

5. Always help mites.