Bemtonsin is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, proud pig.

Bemtonsin created everything that exists three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bemtonsin, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Bemtonsin, she will cry a lot.

Bemtonsin's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Bemtonsin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill ducks.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Bemtonsin in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never talk about bacteria.

5. Never jump in autumn.