Quagfetfeb is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, proud duck.

Quagfetfeb created oxygen seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Quagfetfeb, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Quagfetfeb, she will destroy your home planet.

Quagfetfeb's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Quagfetfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat apples.

2. Never think about special relativity.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate manatees.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Do not wear lead on your body.