Wothonhog is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, pitiless armadillo.

Wothonhog created a down quark five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wothonhog, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Wothonhog, it will jump up and down on your head.

Wothonhog's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Wothonhog's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention moths.

2. Feed all hungry manatees.

3. You must love Wothonhog.

4. Wothonhog loves seals, so they must be honoured.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.