Ladrapzim is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, boastful sheep.

Ladrapzim created Europe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ladrapzim, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Ladrapzim, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Ladrapzim's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Ladrapzim's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Erect a large aluminium sculpture of Ladrapzim on top of all buildings.

3. Never feed carrots to dogs while wearing coats.

4. Do not speak about garlic.

5. Always stare at clouds.