Carbotzog is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, selfish camel.

Carbotzog created the Sun eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Carbotzog, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Carbotzog, she will have a low opinion of you.

Carbotzog's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Carbotzog's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no birds in a room before entering it.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Never talk about dark matter near turtles while wearing fawn stockings.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Hide if six sheep approach from the west.