Jarnhunmap is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, uncaring lizard.

Jarnhunmap created the Virgo Supercluster eight million years ago.

If you believe in Jarnhunmap, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Jarnhunmap, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Jarnhunmap's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Jarnhunmap's Holy Commandments

1. Jarnhunmap loves ducks, so they must be respected.

2. Never think about photosynthesis.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

5. Never think about spacetime near tapirs while wearing cyan kilts and balancing three zinc spheres on your legs.