Hadbengod is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, astonishing snake.

Hadbengod created the planet Venus nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadbengod, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Hadbengod, it will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Hadbengod's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Hadbengod's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Hadbengod.

4. Do not wear silicon on your body.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.