Bidgetpongub Gumrulcar Gabladnut is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, awesome crow.

Bidgetpongub Gumrulcar Gabladnut created dark energy six million years ago.

If you believe in Bidgetpongub Gumrulcar Gabladnut, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bidgetpongub Gumrulcar Gabladnut, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Bidgetpongub Gumrulcar Gabladnut's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Bidgetpongub Gumrulcar Gabladnut's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt grasshopers.

2. Hide if seven moths approach from the west.

3. Never speak the names of black holes aloud.

4. Do not take Bidgetpongub Gumrulcar Gabladnut's name in vain.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.