Bissvab is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, unselfish cat.

Bissvab created a down quark nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Bissvab, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Bissvab, it will remove you from existence.

Bissvab's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Bissvab's Holy Commandments

1. Always store garlic above ground.

2. Heed all visions.

3. Always act with purity.

4. Do not speak about peanuts.

5. Hide from fawn turtles for they are unholy.