Nurlcenpog is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, unthoughtful owl.

Nurlcenpog created the universe three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurlcenpog, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nurlcenpog, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Nurlcenpog's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Nurlcenpog's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never write about fluid mechanics.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Respect your elders.