Bissnullam is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, blissful seal.

Bissnullam created viruses three million years ago.

If you believe in Bissnullam, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bissnullam, he will turn you into a rock.

Bissnullam's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Bissnullam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about chlorophyll.

2. Erect a giant silicon sculpture of Bissnullam in the centre of the settlement.

3. Learn three new languages a year.

4. Do not trade with those who eat tomatoes.

5. Feed all hungry nematodes.