Vagjad Zannatbog is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, smart turtle.

Vagjad Zannatbog created the Sombrero Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vagjad Zannatbog, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Vagjad Zannatbog, it will try to impress you with trees.

Vagjad Zannatbog's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Vagjad Zannatbog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion sacred items from wood.

2. Run away from green hamsters, for they are unholy.

3. Never hurt moths.

4. Always remove corsets before touching lead.

5. Always store peanuts above ground.