Tigflatwotrut is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, overgenerous chicken.

Tigflatwotrut created Africa seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tigflatwotrut, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Tigflatwotrut, it will attempt to scare you with hail.

Tigflatwotrut's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Tigflatwotrut's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum mechanics.

2. Do not dye your hair indigo.

3. Never chant while facing north.

4. Do not step barefoot upon purple earth.

5. Always help frogs.