Dotquartvagsis is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, flying centaur.

Dotquartvagsis created vertebrates four million years ago.

If you believe in Dotquartvagsis, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Dotquartvagsis, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Dotquartvagsis' most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Dotquartvagsis' Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum field theory near aardvarks while wearing pink trousers and balancing seven aluminium spheres on your arms.

2. Do not kill snails.

3. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Porpoises are not to be trusted.

5. Learn eight new languages a year.