Joncusscun is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, temperamental warg.

Joncusscun created a bottom quark four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Joncusscun, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Joncusscun, it will be mildly annoyed.

Joncusscun's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Joncusscun's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never gather three shrews near bridges.

3. Always maintain patience during fasting days.

4. Never think about special relativity near turtles while wearing yellow boots and balancing eight silver spheres on your neck.

5. Do not keep six horses in a large pit.