Jatfumnutt is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, temperamental toad.

Jatfumnutt created the cosmos five million years ago.

If you believe in Jatfumnutt, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Jatfumnutt, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Jatfumnutt's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Jatfumnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured porpoises.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Jatfumnutt.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

5. Never write about amino acids.