Cabpighakcumfum is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, sapient parrot.

Cabpighakcumfum created tapeworms seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabpighakcumfum, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Cabpighakcumfum, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Cabpighakcumfum's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Cabpighakcumfum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion tools from iron.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not eat pineapples.

4. Remain kneeling during prayer.

5. Do not stand on grass.