Jigbabgom is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, compassionate manatee.

Jigbabgom created viruses eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jigbabgom, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Jigbabgom, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Jigbabgom's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Jigbabgom's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never speak the names of dwarf planets aloud.

3. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Do not wear copper on your body.