Hapgetbut is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, omnipotent swallow.

Hapgetbut created a photon six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hapgetbut, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Hapgetbut, it will be very unhappy.

Hapgetbut's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Hapgetbut's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if eight turtles approach from the west.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not take Hapgetbut's name in vain.

4. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

5. Do not speak about turnips.
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