Loopyatpog is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, unjust centipede.

Loopyatpog created life nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Loopyatpog, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Loopyatpog, she will jump up and down on your head.

Loopyatpog's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Loopyatpog's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather eight foxes in one place.

2. Do not gather at walls at dusk.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never think about archaea.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force near seals while wearing red rings and balancing seven gold spheres on your chest.