Flisjappibmum is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, prudent seal.

Flisjappibmum created the Large Magellanic Cloud six million years ago.

If you believe in Flisjappibmum, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Flisjappibmum, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Flisjappibmum's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Flisjappibmum's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about comets.

2. You must never eat coconuts.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Erect a large silver sculpture of Flisjappibmum on top of all buildings.