Stragcabbellsand Sityakjon Hakfencemdot is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, humane lizard.

Stragcabbellsand Sityakjon Hakfencemdot created Africa eight million years ago.

If you believe in Stragcabbellsand Sityakjon Hakfencemdot, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Stragcabbellsand Sityakjon Hakfencemdot, she will remove you from existence.

Stragcabbellsand Sityakjon Hakfencemdot's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Stragcabbellsand Sityakjon Hakfencemdot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate sheep.

4. Never stain your chest with blue.

5. Always act with obedience when addressing priests.