Flowtailget is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, smart yak.

Flowtailget created the Small Magellanic Cloud four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flowtailget, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Flowtailget, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Flowtailget's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Flowtailget's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Flowtailget.

2. Always cleanse oil with water.

3. Pray only in darkness.

4. Never allow frogs to sleep beneath your roof.

5. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Flowtailget in the centre of the settlement.