Tomsafquim is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, happy hedgehog.

Tomsafquim created bats seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tomsafquim, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Tomsafquim, he will turn you into a mouse.

Tomsafquim's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Tomsafquim's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never curse while facing east.

5. Never cross mountains at midnight.