Kingodril is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, irritating pigeon.

Kingodril created a top quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kingodril, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Kingodril, he will turn you into a hamster.

Kingodril's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Kingodril's Holy Commandments

1. Never record signs.

2. Never jump in holy places.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.

5. Always maintain patience during holy days.