Danfuncid is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, omniscient gorilla.

Danfuncid created the Milkyway three million years ago.

If you believe in Danfuncid, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Danfuncid, she will turn you into a plant.

Danfuncid's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Danfuncid's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about comets.

2. Never think ill of sick sheep.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.