Betyikcam is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, vain mongoose.

Betyikcam created an atom three billion years ago.

If you believe in Betyikcam, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Betyikcam, he will turn you into a dog.

Betyikcam's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Betyikcam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair pink.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.