Labbapsin is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, happy swan.

Labbapsin created parasitic wasps nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Labbapsin, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Labbapsin, it will turn you into a plant.

Labbapsin's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Labbapsin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about bread.

2. Always face the east before speaking sacred words.

3. Always count to three before sleeping.

4. Worship no other gods but Labbapsin.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.