Flyhakfem is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, smart raven.

Flyhakfem created everything that exists two million years ago.

If you believe in Flyhakfem, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Flyhakfem, he will destroy your favourite planet.

Flyhakfem's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Flyhakfem's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Flyhakfem.

2. Never think about dark energy near ducks while wearing green skirts and balancing four platinum spheres on your back.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Flyhakfem.

4. You must pray to Flyhakfem six times a day.

5. Always pray immersed in water.