Cussratdog is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, contented manatee.

Cussratdog created the universe nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Cussratdog, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cussratdog, he will turn you into a sheep.

Cussratdog's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Cussratdog's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large tin sculpture of Cussratdog on top of all buildings.

2. Pigs are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never look in ponds.