Cunomtladdid is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, fast tortoise.

Cunomtladdid created Europe four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cunomtladdid, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Cunomtladdid, she will have a low opinion of you.

Cunomtladdid's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Cunomtladdid's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of doves.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never feed lots of lemons to squirrels while wearing cyan skirts.

5. You must pray to Cunomtladdid three times a day.