Benyak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, unjust clam.

Benyak created an up quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Benyak, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Benyak, she will turn you into a mole.

Benyak's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Benyak's Holy Commandments

1. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

2. You must love Benyak.

3. Do not wear kilts marked with pink.

4. Never speak aloud of signs.

5. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.