Wipvinbig is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, smart monkey.

Wipvinbig created a Higgs boson twelve years ago.

If you believe in Wipvinbig, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Wipvinbig, it will turn you into a frog.

Wipvinbig's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Wipvinbig's Holy Commandments

1. Never cross mountains at dawn.

2. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

3. Never chant in the presence of elders.

4. Always help sheep.

5. You must pray to Wipvinbig five times a day.