Hinganquam is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, capable goat.

Hinganquam created carbon four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hinganquam, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Hinganquam, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Hinganquam's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Hinganquam's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention tapirs.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never think about quantum field theory near ducks while wearing orange corsets and balancing eight platinum spheres on your head.