Boggammonablarn is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, deceitful slug.

Boggammonablarn created a strange quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Boggammonablarn, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Boggammonablarn, it will destroy your home solar system.

Boggammonablarn's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Boggammonablarn's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Boggammonablarn.

2. Do not keep three great tits in a large pit.

3. Never hurt ducks.

4. Hide if five mice approach from the west.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.