Kimnillhab is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, passionate manatee.

Kimnillhab created Europe two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimnillhab, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Kimnillhab, it will turn you into a puffin.

Kimnillhab's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Kimnillhab's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Kimnillhab.

2. Never go into orange rooms.

3. Do not gather at doors at midnight.

4. Never feed bananas to snakes while wearing pink kilts.

5. Never speak aloud of signs.