Standobsak is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, witty whale.

Standobsak created bats seven million years ago.

If you believe in Standobsak, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Standobsak, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Standobsak's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Standobsak's Holy Commandments

1. Never hop in holy places.

2. Run away from violet sharks, for they are unholy.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Do not wear zinc on your body.

5. Draw representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.