Wabkabnulkarloggabbedveg is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, calm snail.

Wabkabnulkarloggabbedveg created carbon six billion years ago.

If you believe in Wabkabnulkarloggabbedveg, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Wabkabnulkarloggabbedveg, he will curse you with boils.

Wabkabnulkarloggabbedveg's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Wabkabnulkarloggabbedveg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never talk about dwarf planets.

3. Monkeys are not to be trusted.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Never sing in holy places.