Badparkrat is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, unsympathetic horse.

Badparkrat created a Higgs boson three billion years ago.

If you believe in Badparkrat, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Badparkrat, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Badparkrat's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Badparkrat's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about spacetime.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Do not drink water in blue rooms.