Carfagfat is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, capable giraffe.

Carfagfat created the Cigar Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Carfagfat, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Carfagfat, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Carfagfat's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Carfagfat's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention eagles.

2. Never talk about planets.

3. Paint representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never feed apples to dogs while wearing skirts.

5. Never look in ponds.