Bumveen is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, cheerful elephant.

Bumveen created viruses four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bumveen, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Bumveen, she will manifest in front of you.

Bumveen's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Bumveen's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into violet rooms.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bumveen.

3. Never paint your chest pink.

4. Draw representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.