Cebciparp is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, all-knowing monkey.

Cebciparp created life seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cebciparp, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cebciparp, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Cebciparp's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Cebciparp's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Never sit in the presence of dogs.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Cebciparp.