Carcussnur is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, generous lizard.

Carcussnur created dark energy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Carcussnur, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Carcussnur, he will ignore you.

Carcussnur's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Carcussnur's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics.

2. Never talk about asteroids.

3. Never bounce in holy places.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Run away if four shrews approach from the east.