Pagkarlistkopmonlun Legkapbom Vaddutveen is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, witless lizard.

Pagkarlistkopmonlun Legkapbom Vaddutveen created energy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pagkarlistkopmonlun Legkapbom Vaddutveen, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Pagkarlistkopmonlun Legkapbom Vaddutveen, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Pagkarlistkopmonlun Legkapbom Vaddutveen's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Pagkarlistkopmonlun Legkapbom Vaddutveen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never think about galaxies.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Snails are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Respect your elders.