Parknulspagjigjophanveg is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, loving crow.

Parknulspagjigjophanveg created time and space six billion years ago.

If you believe in Parknulspagjigjophanveg, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Parknulspagjigjophanveg, he will turn you into a sheep.

Parknulspagjigjophanveg's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Parknulspagjigjophanveg's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat strawberries.

2. Learn six new languages a year.

3. Never talk about quantum field theory.

4. Never write about dwarf planets.

5. Do not trade with those who eat bread.