Miftarpboss is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, self-confident spider.

Miftarpboss created a Higgs boson five million years ago.

If you believe in Miftarpboss, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Miftarpboss, it will turn you into a slug.

Miftarpboss' most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Miftarpboss' Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of moths.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Never think about solid mechanics.

4. Never feed lots of beans to horses while wearing red ear rings.

5. Never eat bark.